Hubbard: Lovely day for a rallyWritten by Ian Hubbard | | firstname.lastname@example.org
Saturday’s neo-Nazi rally was about as laughable a ruse as you could imagine. It was as though the doubles for the Illinois Nazis from “The Blues Brothers” wanted to waste some good taxpayer money, which was the biggest crime of the day. Yeah, there was a little tension amongst the crowd — I got out when a couple hooligans with prison tats crossed me. I figured there was no heroism in being roughed up by men whom you owe no debt to.
There was screaming and chanting and fist-pumping and middle fingers abounding, but nothing — not even the weapons permit — really gave the day that dread that hit the area 10 years ago. Everybody seemed to have pretty much learned their lesson that causing a riot only works if you break the other guy’s shit and not your own. Karl Frank would even tell you that.
It was the usual pissed-off people saying the usual pissed-off slogans and phrases. The head honcho, who looked like Dr. Strangelove’s nephew, spewed forth the rage of a teething kitten through a bullhorn made in the ’90s about the government this, the government that and how we should all be ashamed we allowed the government to do this and that. It was more of a Tea Party rally donned in faded Nazi glory.
If that is the face of American Hate then I piss laughing at its condescending smile and clay feet that crumbled in the face of the Allies, Jake and Elwood. Why the crowd taunted and jeered and cussed up a storm still bugs the hell out of me. Have we not learned that lesson? Have we not learned that it is best to ignore and satirize than throw our shoulders back and challenge them to a bloody brawl?
Of course they wanna fight! Why the hell else are they even around? Because they know all we’ll do is break our own shit! Just like we did 10 years ago and like we do anytime the routine is broken. Don’t throw the brick through the shop window; throw the damn thing through their window!
As badass as those swastikas look, them Nazis wouldn’t have stood a chance against that crowd had it not been for the badges and SWAT teams standing guard. Hell, they caught a good amount of heat, too. I’d say a good 30 percent of the crowd was giving the cops an earful for guarding those buffoons in the name of whatever is left of the First Amendment. And after what’s happened the last six months, can you blame them?
That military presence, though. That was the most unsettling part. Helicopters? Snipers? Really? Did ya need to go full Kennedy on Downtown? Why didn’t ya go the full nine and dress up in plain clothes and instigate a fight while you’re at it? Yeah, they didn’t want a bomb dropping on Downtown, but what the hell was with the Humvee? This ain’t Fallujah …. yet.
If that’s what they’re rolling out to a protest nowadays, then what will they roll out when the shit goes down? I’m excited to see. I’m excited for the fight against that militaristic presence, which is what should have been protested against. The hate and anger toward a pile of scurvy rats like the neo-Nazis still far outweigh the hate and anger toward a War Machine that is eating this country and shitting out the world.
It’s because neo-Nazis have a face. It’s a face we can throw jabs at and cuss at and spit at. It’s a face of hate, which is only matched with more, severe hate. Our War Machine — and it is ours — exists on its own. It is a sprawling apparatus that deals in the shadows yet operates right out in front of us. It has a thousand faces with a thousand crowns, all with enough bombs and ammunition to wipe this planet out of the galaxy. It does not hate because it cannot feel, yet we feel its crushing weight.
Still, I’m excited to see what new toys they roll out for the next sideshow. Maybe instead of neo-Nazis we can cobble together some commies or socialists or immigrants or gays or our African-American friends and give them a bullhorn and a pulpit to shout from. Maybe instead of just one Humvee, they’ll roll out a tank. And instead of choppers, a few drones will be covering the skies with an eye on all of us. Who knows? We’ll just have to wait until next time.
Ian Hubbard can be reached at email@example.com.