Morrissey: An ode to apathyWritten by Tom Morrissey | | firstname.lastname@example.org
Apathy is my addiction and my reality. I’m apathetic. And pun intended, I don’t care.
Apathy. It gets a bum rap. A negative connotation. A furrowed brow. A befuddled glare. A self-righteous lecture. It even comprises the word “pathetic.” Who wants to be described by a synonym of dismal, pitiable, and useless plus a one-letter prefix?
To be apathetic is to not care enough to find the TV remote after Joel McHale’s oh-so-short airing of “The Soup” has expired. Eventually, one is inadvertently and regretfully keeping up with those painful Kardashians to the extent that one knows who Kendall and Kylie Jenner are, and has obtained the ability to successfully defend Scott Disick from the vicious women in the break room at work.
In this month of Thanksgiving, I’m grateful my apathy hasn’t doomed me to having a television stuck on MTV. I couldn’t remain sane with “Jersey Shore” and “Teen Mom” marathons poisoning my brain. Perhaps MTV is the cure to my TV-remote apathy.
After getting past the cultural disapproval, apathy really is the best way to go. Ignorance truly is bliss. Not caring enough to know what is going on in the world creates a slight piece of heaven on earth.
It’s almost like deleting one’s Facebook account — problems and drama disappear, peace and tranquility ensue. The frantic status updates that are concluded with “FML” no longer annoy. The friend requests from strangers and stalkers vanish, and there is no need to manage a blocked person list. Privacy and time are regained.
It may be shunned, but when apathy provides incredible peace of mind and serenity, why should peer pressure persuade a person to partake of the stress, depression and chronic migraines that local, national and world news bring about?
Pass the Prozac, please. That Lunesta looks useful, too.
I decided to take an active leap into the local fray that is Toledo politics more than five years ago. After taking a serious hiatus from caring about the issues that affect Toledo — mostly budget issues — I recently watched 10 minutes of the local news, after actively avoiding everything for nearly a year — and nothing has changed.
Issues stemming from budget problems still exist. The mayor is definitely a different person. No longer an aging, scrappy old white guy, he’s now an intimidating former fire chief with serious facial hair.
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.
Same issues, same problems, same nonsolutions. Why should I care? The end result will always be the same. More money will be taken from me, by force. It doesn’t matter what the peons who comprise the Toledo population think. The political elite, in their infinite wisdom, have already decided our financial sacrifice.
So in a town with a population of fewer than 300,000 people and with no real way to influence the political tide, short of making a run for office (which brings its own complications thanks to the local political parties), why should I then care what happens statewide or nationally?
Maybe I’m just burned out and cranky, throwing my temper tantrum because I can’t get my way, but I’ve removed the headaches and stress. I’ve removed the addiction to local blogs, national drama and international stress. I’m enjoying the apolitical lifestyle.
Priorities rearranged: the enjoyment of the new blink-182 album, the fight for decent seats for the next big act at the Huntington Center, compassion for those poor petitioners and peoplewatching are better options than caring about and participating in a system that wastes my time and energy.
It’s less about societal effectiveness and more about removing the headaches and time-suck.
I’m positive I won’t be playing blink-182’s “I Miss You” with Toledo politics in mind anytime soon.
Email Tom Morrissey at email@example.com.