Eventista: Mrs. PostalWritten by Brittany Craig | | firstname.lastname@example.org
For some brides, planning their wedding becomes more than a job or hobby, but something of an obsession. They take it on with full force, emotionally and mentally. So after the ‘I Dos’ have been said, the rice has been tossed, the cake cut and the pictures taken, what is she to do?
About one in 10 women are diagnosed with the “post-wedding blues” or post-wedding depression.
“Post-wedding blues is a normal emotional state for brides,” said Toledo clinical psychologist Marina Lung. “This is not due to the marriage itself but rather a feeling of loss of all the excitement, energy and focus in the wedding preparation and planning process. Often, the wedding takes on a life of its own.”
The joy and excitement of a wedding engagement is contagious and oftentimes brides will find their friends getting married, too. Back-to-back weddings can create an ulterior competition. So when the focus leaves them and is on to the next wedding and the next bride, they are left with a feeling of emptiness.
“Brides have been the star among family and friends for the past year and now it is difficult to adjust to no longer being the focus of attention,” Lung said.
The extinguished spotlight can also leave a bride with more time on her hands than she knows what to do with. In preparation for their wedding, brides often tackle and manage a long list of wedding particulars, fine tuning all the little details. Therefore little time is spent to themselves.
“Brides may feel bored and disappointed in social events because nothing can compare to the emotional high they’ve been on for so long, releasing ‘feel good’ chemicals in their brain called endorphins,” Lung said. “It can take several weeks or months to adjust to lowering these chemicals.”
So what is a bride to do if she is feeling the post-wedding blues? Here are a few suggestions:
Write yourself a note. As you sit down to compose thank you notes for your wedding gifts, think of the gift of marriage. Sure Aunt Sally’s crystal vase is one to cherish, but so is finding the man of your dreams and settling into a life together. So, count up your gifts and be sure to include all the blessings your marriage has bestowed on both of you. When you are feeling low, read your note to remind yourself how fortunate you are.
Pick up the remote. Go to your DVR settings and stop recording all the bridal shows on your to-do list. Next, go to your magazine stack and recycle or donate your wedding magazines. Continue around your house and tidy up wedding paraphernalia and accessories. Most likely, you’ve surrounded yourself with all things wedding. You need to give yourself a little break.
Refocus your energies to something just as productive and satisfying. Take a pottery or cooking class, join a book club or fitness center. Get out there and make new friends and expand your horizons. Better yet, pick something you and your new husband can do together. Start a hobby that the two of you can share throughout your lifetime together.
Like they say, ‘Happy Life, Happy Wife’. So, get out there and enjoy your married life!
Brittany Craig is the principal event designer and coordinator for Crowning Celebrations. She specializes in wedding and social celebrations. Follow her Eventista blog at www.crowningcelebrations.blogspot.com.