Film review: ‘2012′ a calamity of cliches
Written by Jim Beard | | news@toledofreepress.com“2012,” now playing, is a comedy. Or a joke. Or both. Disjointed and schizophrenic, it seems to have no idea of precisely what it’s supposed to be.
Now, disaster films have been a staple since the early 1970s and arguably built upon cliché, but director Roland Emmerlich decided to not only load “2012” to the gills with stereotypes but then to quite inexplicably make fun of them. This movie teeters and totters between weepy, angst-ridden scenes of pseudo-pathos and moments – no, whole stretches – of near slapstick comedy. The yucks make mincemeat of the “grave” shots of people dying in various horrible ways, which in turn make the broad, un-funny comedy look entirely out of place. It’d be too easy to call this film a disaster – let’s just call it a mess.
Cusack
The plot’s simple: the world comes to an end. There’s some hoo-hah about solar flares or whatnot making the Earth heat up and flip its lid but that’s quickly set aside for angle after angle of disasters so huge you can only smirk at them. And they’re repeated, ad infinitum. There are three whole acts of planes trying to take off through airborne labyrinths of crumbling stuff. I mean what I say; you’re treated to this wonderfully creative idea three times in a row, each time more ludicrous.
In case you’re wondering, yes, there are people in this epic. Like in classic Godzilla movies before them humans are more-or-less grafted onto “2012” and their stories are as superficial as the latest pop tunes. You don’t really care much for any of the cast and reach a point where you hope that the Earth will just swallow them whole and be done with it. John Cusack’s divorced father-struggling writer character is a cliché that demands a moratorium, along with Danny Glover’s beleaguered, lisping heart-of-gold President. We’re also treated to a thinly-veiled “Evil Conservatives vs. Bleeding Heart Liberals” fun-fest that’s so heavy-handed it makes the shot of the Sistine Chapel cracking right between Adam and the outstretched hand of God look like the finest of drama. We get it. No need to hammer it home.
Or maybe there is. The audience I saw “2012” with ate it up, laughing and ooh-ahhing all the way. Good thing the film ends – no spoilers – with a potty joke. I think we all deserved it.
