I have made a habit out of telling my children that we live in the best country in the world.  We also happen to live in the best state, the best city and the best neighborhood.  My children go to the best school, their dad is the best dad and they are, without a doubt in my mind, the best children that have ever roamed the earth.

My unwavering allegiance to declaring the best of everyone and everything did get a bit tricky upon the arrival of our second daughter. My past assertion that our first daughter was the best girl in the whole world had to be adapted to take daughter No. 2 into account.  Luckily, she doesn’t seem to mind sharing the title of “one of the two best girls in the whole world.”

Now, I do realize that being told that someone or something is the best, especially during your formative years, could potentially lead to some degree of egocentrism. However, I temper my claims of greatness by qualifying my use of the word “best” to my children. I explain to them that everyone should have the opportunity to think that their country is the best, to feel secure in and be proud of his or her citizenship.

A country is like a family. It’s a bunch of people stuck together, presumably for the entirety of their lives, based primarily on the luck of the draw.  Each individual member is just that — an individual — an individual with his or her own inherent feelings, opinions and general outlook on life. With such a vast assortment of unique characters, long-term unity is certainly a complex task.

The family I grew up in can surely be summed up as a vast assortment of unique characters. As we have grown and branched off to create our own families, our differences have only seemed to widen. Instead of just learning how to accept each other’s personalities or share a bedroom, we are now faced with accepting the way each of us raises our children, conducts business and generally leads our lives. Yet, despite our differences, we somehow keep coming back together time and time again.

When I stop to consider why such a phenomenon occurs, I have to think that it has much to do with a deep-rooted appreciation for the family itself. I grew up in a family where we were taught to love each other whether we liked it or not.  Sometimes we liked it, sometimes not. Either way, the general idea stuck.

After getting quite a few years of real world experience under my belt and seeing how other families operate, I now know that not every family does love each other unconditionally. Unfortunately, some families use and abuse one another.  Some individuals never have the opportunity to feel secure and proud of where they came from, either as a member of a family or as a citizen of a country.

As much as my siblings and I differ in every which way, there will always be a foundation of loyalty, mutual respect and common ground due to the simple fact that our parents let us know that we were a part of something great.  If such a basis is that essential to keeping a group of six people together, it is even more essential for a group of 300 million.

In the difficult moments of being a family or being a country, it is that foundation of loyalty, mutual respect, common ground, security and pride that pulls us through.  I want my own children to have such a starting point to hold onto for the rest of their lives.

Claiming “best” status does not necessarily mean that someone or something is better than someone else or something else.  It simply means that it’s the best for you, because it’s yours, it’s always been yours and you’re going to make the best of it. Whether you like it or not.

Shannon Szyperski and her husband Michael are raising three children in Sylvania. E-mail her at letters@toledofreepress.com.

This entry was posted on Friday, July 3rd, 2009 at 12:00 am and is filed under Arts and Life, Family Practice.
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